A US-based Nigerian woman, Blessing Nwachukwu, has kicked against the payment of bride price during a wedding.
Nwachukwu, who is now divorced, expressed displeasure about the tradition in a Facebook post on Monday, March 3.
According to her, she decided that she did not want bride price paid on her after witnessing her cousin’s bride price negotiation during which she was treated like a commodity.
“The day I knew that I didn’t want any bride price paid on me was when I was in my cousin’s bride price negotiation room in our village. Yeah, women are usually not allowed to be there but I was the photographer so I was allowed in,” she wrote.
‘’I sat through the entire scene and watched them haggle bride price as if my cousin and her fiancé weren’t just two people in love who wanted to be together forever. The whole affair was treated like a product.
At a point, the in-laws got up and wanted to even leave. They eventually settled on a price which to me at the time was very high and in today’s value would run into millions. This was alongside other items like goats, yams, etc. My people’s claim was that she had a master’s degree from UK and yada, yada, yada.
‘’Well, after that fiasco, I told my Mom I was not interested in a traditional marriage. I didn’t want anyone paying bride price on me unless that traditional marriage didn’t require any form of bride price and just a significant $1 amount or the lowest Nigerian note in form of a dowry. I am not for sa~le, no matter how anyone puts it.
I posted about this in 2013 or so and the internet went wi~ld. People told me I’d reg~ret my decision. Well, 12 years later and I still stand by that. I don’t want such paid on me.
Why should my husband to be, be billed to marry me? It’s a partnership. If anyone bills him, then his people must bill my people so it can be balanced. I am not a product and definitely not for sale.
Tradition or not! So that tomorrow, any little thing he won’t complain how he bou~ght me from my people? Ha! Please keep the money. After all, is the marriage one sided? Is the pleasure one sided? Are the incoming kids one sided?
It is one marriage, one home, one family. If you feel some type of way cos of what I said, that’s your own wahala o. It’s my own life and choice. You can pay for your fiancée’s bride price but that’s why I’m not your fiancée. No be today I get different view about life.”
